What to do?

Today I had one of those moments you hear about, but don’t really know what to do when it actually happens. I played for a woman who is apparently very close to passing. She had her eyes closed the entire time, though she did raise her head a open her mouth a few times. After about a half hour, I stopped and said farewell. I packed up to leave, and as I was walking out the door, she called out to me. She said “Hey!” I turned around, a bit baffled, and walked back over to her. I wasn’t sure what to do at this point. I asked if she needed anything – I think, or maybe I was just thinking of doing so. She had her eyes open now and was looking at me. I couldn’t read her expression, though her eyes were telling me something. I would like to think it was gratitude, but one of the first things we harp therapists learn is not to make assumptions, even if it is very likely. It seemed she may have wanted to say something else, but she couldn’t really speak. Maybe she didn’t have the energy. But she looked at me. I looked back at her.

I can’t help wondering if maybe I should have done or said something more. It seemed a bit presumptuous to say “You’re welcome.” So after looking at each other for I don’t know how long, I said “Ok I’m going now. Take care.” It seemed so hollow. I can only hope that she really was grateful and saying “Hey!” was her way of thanking me and sharing that eye contact was enough for her.

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